The gift of the bed bug

No, this isn't a relationship with other people, but it is what we on my mind most of yesterday as we began the process of getting our house ready for extermination.

Part of the process of getting rid of bed bugs is removing anything soft from the infested rooms either going through it to ensure that it is not infested and putting it in an unifested room or packing it up to treat it.

In this process I became very aware of just how much stuff, I still had. Last spring I had cleaned out a lot of stuff, but this process made it clear that I still had a lot of stuff that I was carrying around.

While the infestation is a huge pain in the rear and freaks me out, I really don't like knowing that I have spent months as bug food...and that my kids have spent months as bug food, I realize that it could be a lot worse than it is and there are lessons to be learned.

Lesson 1: trust my instincts. Several weeks ago I started noticing bugs near the beds, just a little one here and there. Nothing serious and with the cold and the dog door I had convinced myself it was no big deal. My gut told me to look more, but I ignored it, hoping I guess that I was wrong. Time to remember to trust the gut.

Lesson 2: centered peace is always there. Spending time really breaking down the stuff in the rooms and looking at the overwhelming amount of laundry that has to be done, the books and records and stuff that has to be examined, the detritus that has to be tossed out, the task could be something that I viewed with dread, especially since I have major assignments to do for school. But keeping in mind the teachings of my mentors I am learning that if I come at tasks with the attitude that I can do it, I will get it done, I might have to really work at it, but it is something I can do. And when I do it from a place of peace, it doesn't feel quite as overwhelming. The bed bugs have given me a chance to practice that inner peace.

Lesson 3: finding my passions. I have basically decided that I have way too many books, and while J's music collection is daunting he has found that he doesn't mind going through them or moving them. I love to read, but I am finding that owning the books is not really a passion. It is a way to fill space. The items of memory haven't been the books I have moved or the seriously Massive amounts of clothing. I have found myself getting distracted by the bits of rock or object that reminds me of a memory. I found myself looking at the pictures and thinking yet again how I really needed to do something with them. I love to read, but I suspect I don't actually love the books. My passion is elsewhere, hidden beneath the overwhelming task of dealing with a passion gone awry. And here I am facing the decision of what I really want to do with my "stuff." I find that I both want it back in it's place and loving the simplicity of my space without it.

Lesson 4: sometimes the infestation isn't visible until it is out of control. According to the specialist, we had the bed bugs for at least 7 months, given how spread out they are. It is possible that we all brought them and we haven't had them that long, but seems unlikely really. So we have been living with these parasites for a long time. Several generations worth of time anyway. The bugs are in all four beds in the house, but not a one of us has show a reaction to the bites. This speaks volumes to my soul. Sometimes that small seed is planted long before the infestation becomes visible and getting rid of the infestation is a long and arduous process. It is not easy to remove parasites. And honestly while it would be nice to rush the work, it really can't be done. Rushing through the process of looking through the books and records and such to look for all possible infestation can lead to that one missed egg that begins the process all over again.

And now, back to the battle.

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