Today was the perfect day for biking. The wind felt great, and I had f.u.n. blasting in my ears bringing up my spirits with music that made me feel happy. As I was listening to it, I realized that f.u.n. is not for everyone. It is a big prog rock sound, definitely pulling some of their vibe from Queen. Not everyone is going to enjoy the over the top nature of the sound. None of the criticism though changes that I enjoy the upbeat, happy feel of the music. It doesn't change that it makes me feel good to listen to it.
I can fully admit that "Stars" is exceptionally cheesy. The auto tuning, the string sections, the children's choir, the big orchestral arranged sound. It is cheesy as all get out, but I can't stop smiling while I listen to the song. So what if it is cheesy, I like it.
Which brings me to a conversation I had with a friend awhile back. He was unamused by the fact that I was not embarrassed by the fact that I enjoy listening to Taylor Swift, Katy Perry and others of that ilk. He got more and more frustrated by my honesty trying to catch me up and I was having none of it. I started to get very irritated with him, not because he was judging my musical choices, but because he was clearly not seeing ME. Not to mention that the things he was saying about the people that enjoy that kind of music were less than kind.
When I asked, "so you see me as _________?" His response was "no, of course not. That's why I don't understand how you can listen to that crap."
Those kind of conversations frustrated me. It was an unwillingness, as I saw it, to let me be me. And of course what I was working my way through at the time, was giving myself permission to be true to me.
As I was listening to "The teachings of Don Juan" this morning, Don Juan said that anger comes because we make the ideas, thoughts and opinions of other people important. To me this says that we get angry when we are more concerned about what other people think than what we think ourselves.
I like the music I like. What someone else has to say about it, just doesn't change that. I am going to be happy and bouncy and in a good mood when I listen to crappy pop music that makes me want to move. I don't really care that the chick in the next office doesn't like the same kind of music. I won't play my music so loudly that I force her to have to listen to it all the time, but if she comes into my office, well, she can suck it up. I don't need to change what I enjoy because she doesn't like it. And similarly, that she likes music I find difficult to which I find it difficult to listen, doesn't change that she is an intelligent, thoughtful, person. She should listen to music that makes her feel whatever it is she wants to feel, and the rest of us be damned. So what if it isn't cool?
If someone doesn't like you because you aren't "cool," well that's their loss. And yes that is easier to say than it is to believe, but I can tell you from experience that being someone else in an attempt to fit in and be liked results in a lot of anger. I decided that me liking me was a lot more important than other people liking me. And I have had far fewer anger issues. I also find that most people like me better now.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
No comments:
Post a Comment