The gift of happiness

I am working with a spiritual director.  We are going through a book titled, "self-unfoldment" which a vedantic search for self and finding the true nature.  It is an interesting book. Chapter 2 is about happiness.  The point of the chapter is to show that true happiness doesn't come from the acquisition of the "stuff" that we think makes us happy in the short run, it is about reducing the desires of our heart to only that which is for the higher good.  Easy to say, hard to do.

One of the stories provided by the author is his look at his purchase of a state of the art stereo.  He waited, saved up money and finally bought what he felt was the perfect stereo.  When it arrived, he listened to music, it filled him with joy to play with the buttons and knobs.  He showed it off to his friends.  The first disappointment with the stereo was that his friends were not nearly as impressed with it as he thought they should be.  They were not that enthusiastic.  This diminished his joy, he still loved the stereo, but it wasn't as shiny anymore.  After some time, he just wasn't as into his stereo as he once was, there was new technology out and he started feeling like a newer stereo would make him happy.  The truth was that this stereo hadn't made him happy, it had boosted him for a while when the desire was fulfilled, but in the end, it wasn't completely fulfilling.

The author gives an equation which says that happiness is equal to the ratio of the number of desires fulfilled to the number of desires entertained.  I thought about this for a long time.  What does this mean?  Ultimately this says, I think that I can be happy if I either increase how many of my desires are fulfilled or reduce the number of things I think I want.

In the Bible there is a story of a rich man who comes to Jesus and asks how he can have eternal life (Mark 10:17-31).  The story basically says you can have eternal life when you sell all you have, give to the poor and follow Christ.  The man couldn't do it.

This story just sort of popped in my head as I was thinking about and reading the chapter on happiness.  It is an extremely rich story with a lot of complicated theological implications that I could discuss for a long time, but the question of the day is how does it relate to happiness.

In the Eastern Religions, the ultimate goal is to reach enlightenment.  That is the true Nirvana, the Heaven so to speak.  In those traditions, the way to enlightenment is in large part to reduce attachment to the stuff of the world.  It is to be "in the world" not "of the world."  The story in Mark has this flavor to it.  The man who couldn't give up his possessions/property/etc was of the world.  He was tied to his idea of wealth, status, security.  He left disappointed, I think, because he remained attached to the idea that "stuff" would make him happy.

Believe me, it is a very difficult thing to let go of the attachment to "stuff" and follow an inner happiness.  I got a lot of my courage to do just that from watching my sister.  But after having spent the last 6 months or so watching the budget, saving money, being "good," J asked me if there was anything I really wanted.  And the truth is that there isn't anything I really want.  Sometimes I think about getting a pedicure, or taking a yoga class.  Sometimes I think about an online class I think sounds interesting, but then after a day or two, the desire for the pedicure, the yoga class and the online class lose their luster and I don't think about it anymore.  They aren't what would make me happy.

The desires of my heart don't seem to be related much to what I can buy anymore.  I am still searching out my community.  I am still trying to find people to talk with about spiritual journeys and searching for the truth.  I am still trying to figure out how to fulfill the call I have for spiritual counseling.  I am still trying to figure out what is next in my world. 

Today I am grateful for the gift of happiness.  For the calm, the quiet the joy that comes from me just feeling happy with what I have.  I am grateful for the support of my friends and family who may think I am a little bit crazy to give up a successful career for something more dicey, but are still behind me 100%.   Thank you all, who are supporting my journey for happiness and truth to my higher self.