Thursday, January 10, 2013

So much, yet nothing really...

I have a million things to say and yet nothing at all to say.

I started the new year with a series of goals related to being a better student, a better band member, to read "good" books. I had a plan for an end of the year ritual with a release of all the things I gave up this year, then N died. And it was like my whole focus shifted.

It is weird. I am having trouble staying focused. I can't seem to finish gathering my thoughts. I find myself setting out to distract myself. I have really wanted to write about the experience, but I can't seem to find the words.

It's all there, but yet, nothing seems to be forth coming.

I have actually had lots of thoughts I want to discuss, but I can't seem to find away to write them out. I feel almost lost. Not depressed, lost.

Maybe if I dedicate some time to it. Really focus on it.

I just don't know.


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