"If he loves me why doesn't he treat me perfectly?"

This sentence just came up in an audio book I am listening to.  The female protagonist of the book is asking this question.  This is then followed by a litany of things that her new husband should be doing to prove his love to her.  All those things she had always imagined came with true love.

I went to an intuitive for a reading, much like a psychic, but she doesn't tell the future, she talks about what is happening in the now, on various levels and looks to see if things are smooth and if now how to help smooth them out.  One of the few questions she asked was, "do you have a solid relationship?"  I had a moment's pause at that one.  Do I have a solid relationship?

Sometimes I feel like my walk into the spiritual and my steps toward simplifying are met with laughter at what will be my utter failure rather than support for actually making changes in my life.  Sometimes I feel like there is small touch of derision in some of the areas where I would prefer just to have support.;  Sometimes I feel like he and I aren't exactly on the same page when it comes to where we are going or what we need.  All of this makes for things to be a little rocky sometimes.  But does a little rockiness mean that we aren't solid?

No.  Underneath all the feelings of mockery is clearly support and love.  So J doesn't always understand me.  I don't always understand him.  Whatever happens, will happen.  And ultimately that is the way of it.  But no romance is perfect.  No true love exists without fights, without compromise, without having to step outside of yourself and take a look at the truth of someone else.

No two people are made to fit perfectly together, no matter what fairy tales teach.

There is a beautiful philosophy in Kabbalistic teaching which says that all of creation contains parts of the creator, and we will continue to create, destroy and recreate until all the pieces of the creator fit together again in harmony.

I imagine this to be much like the most complicated of jigsaw puzzles.

I used to have a jigsaw puzzle of the night sky.  This was one of the most complicated puzzles I had ever put together.  It was like 1000 pieces and most of them were black.  It took forever to do.  Sometimes there were pieces that were obviously mean to be together, and they fit relatively smoothly, but most of the pieces were attached, taken out, attached somewhere else, cast aside to be used later, moved around.  During the process of constructing and reconstructing, some of those pieces were squished a bit, some of them were torn a bit, some of them had the top layer of cardboard not fully in place.  All this made it so that even when they were connected to the right piece, it didn't always fit just perfectly.  Yet in the complete picture it made absolute sense.

I smiled at the woman as she waited for my answer.  "Yes," I told her.  I have a solid relationship.  She smiled at that and said, "Yes, you do.  I wondered if you knew it."

Fairy tales and romance novels are fun, but there is no such thing as a perfect fit.  Love doesn't mean fitting together without a hitch.  Love means seeing beneath the spots that feel a little rough, and seeing the larger picture.  Is your relationship solid?  Do you fit together, even if it isn't always perfect?